Wedding Invitation Wording for Same Sex Couples

What to write on a wedding invitation if you are a same sex couple?

This is something we are asked more and more, so we thought we’d share a few tips, which we hope are helpful. The good news is that there are no strict rules for same sex wedding invitation wording etiquette.  However, we would caveat this by saying that just as with a heterosexual wedding, the key thing to remember is that you need to get the important information across – in the most concise, clear way possible.

What type of thing should I think about for my wedding invitation Wording?

Good question; there are quite a few things that we would recommend taking into consideration. So we have compiled a useful checklist of key details that should be included:

  • Name of the person/s being invited – include the name of children, if they are invited too
  • Who the invitation is from – i.e. the name/s of the host/s
  • Names of the bride and bride / groom and groom
  • Wedding location, date and time
  • Make clear what the invitation is for – i.e. the ceremony, reception and/or an evening party
  • Information about the reception / evening party – to include venue and timings etc.
  • Dress code
  • How to RSVP

With this in mind, the next question is whether to use informal wedding invitation wording or keep it more formal?

Many same-sex couples, we’ve designed wedding invitations for, have found themselves treading a fine line between tradition and innovation and as a result they have opted to retain at least some of the more traditional wedding invitation wording formats.

So what exactly is the traditional format for a traditional wedding invitation wording?  According to the ultimate guide to British etiquette, Debretts, it is as follows:

Mr and Mrs (insert name of father, ie John Smith)

request the pleasure of

your company at the marriage

of their daughter

(insert bride’s first name)


(insert full name of groom here)

At (insert venue name and address)

On (insert date)

at (insert time)

and afterwards at

(insert name and address of reception venue)

The RSVP address is then included in the bottom left hand corner.

As a majority of same sex couples either foot the bill for the wedding themselves, or it is covered jointly by both families, so the wedding invitation needs to reflect this.

For example, if the couple is paying:

John Smith and Peter Brown

request the pleasure of your company…..

If you can’t decide whose name goes first, then we would suggest alphabetical order.

Or, of the couple and their families are paying jointly:

Together with their families

Emma and Kate

Request the pleasure of your company

the Portland wedding invitation showing calligraphy printed text for a same sex weddingThe Portland Wedding Invitation

Another point to remember is never to use abbreviations when it comes to venues or addresses – as your guests could end up at the wrong location!

Whether you choose this traditional invitation wording, or opt for something that’s entirely unique to you, our top tip with any wedding invitation wording is to keep it simple.  We can’t overstate the importance of this!  Your invitation can be as informal and creative as you like, BUT, it ALWAYS needs to have clear, easy-to-understand details and instructions.  Most often people skim read invitations, so don’t be too long-winded, clever or cutesy, as it’s vital to minimize confusion.  It’s why we would usually suggest straightforward wording, with a little bit of flair added!  You can always scratch that creative itch with your other wedding stationery needs – from save the dates, to wedding placement and menus – nothing is impossible!

Pemberly Fox's Brooklyn Wedding Invitation for a same sex marriageThe Brooklyn Wedding Invitation

Don’t forget that at Pemberly Fox we have a wealth of experience of wedding invitation wording, for all types of marriages.  We are always on hand to help advise your choice of card and wording; to help you find the perfect look and feel for your dream wedding stationery.

For a more comprehensive guide on wedding invitation wording etiquette please see our more detailed blog.

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